It's been while....

Wow.. I am less than three weeks away from the big birthday and I cannot seem to get inspired enough to write. My last post really took it out of me..Needless to say I am close to leaving my "New England Bulge" in the past ..even though it feels like the fat cells are staging some sort of "sit in" a la Malcolm X... They are not trying to leave, and are holding on for dear life ..."by any means necessary".
Two days after I penned my last post , I got a call from a fellow fashionista that way back had asked me to be the MUA for a fashion show taking place in New Haven this summer...She signed me on for June 12th ..I reluctantly accepted, as I figured one or the other ..1. God wants to test me or #2. The devil wants to squash me. Either or I signed my name on the dotted line as I held my breath... Holding my breath is something I have become very good at lately ...I don't think my lungs like it much and it usually makes me pretty dizzy.
Now back to this fat that is hanging on for dear life! I have hired a trainer , my waist it whittling down by the day .. however the needle on the scale just won't budge.. This round of calorie cycling has been pretty challenging..considering that I am eating what it takes to sustain a small toddler.. I am pretty confused as to why the fat is hanging on.. I figure it has to do with the fact hat there is a HUGE part of me that does not want to let go of the "New England Bulge" . Maybe going back for a week will help liberate me ...maybe I'll be so sick to my stomach I won't eat and lose the last couple of pounds ..who knows?....
When I started this blog, my goal was to loose 100lbs and conquer all of my demons in 152 days...Well here is the realistic prediction. 50lbs, 22 inches and maybe 30% of my demons.
I figure that is more than many people achieve in a lifetime. So I have decided to keep writing .. I am also working on creating a web magazine called "MY BEAUTY UNLEASHED" I have purchased the domain and will begin production on it July of 2010. So look out for www.mybeautyunleashed.com.
The dating scene has become pretty interesting as well ...but that will be revealed in the next few posts.. I just wanted to reach out and let you know that I am alive and kicking in the sunshine state..and will be back with more stories soon!